Dangerous Child??!!!!

Now I don't usually rant or my blood boiling but today I was in tears and finding myself very defensive over my daughter. I turned up at the childminders all appears fine then she says she needs to talk to me instantly my heart is in my mouth. As she precedes to tell me that the other mum thinks my child is dangerous and that she thinks her daughter is unsafe. What the hell?!!! my daughter is 20 months old and the other little girl is few months younger. My daughter is not violent and am adamant on sharing and very strict on hitting, just the hint of her slapping and she is into time out, I am adamant my daughter will share and not hit. I will not have her tarnished with a bully brush or dysfunctional child brush, if anything sometimes i can be too strict with her as i worry about other people. My daughter happens to love this other girl and shares with her loads, im not about to question this other mother or rant about her child's behavior or the sort of person the mum is, as that would make me as bad as her and i have already aired my views to the childminder and my fiance. When my daughter has hit its usually at the end of the day, everyone is turning up, the house is busy and she just happens to slap or push, not in a nasty way and the other girl is never hurt. It just frustrated me that my daughter and my upbringing of her is questioned. Surely us mums must stick together its bad enough we feel judged by the rest of the world but by our own kind?!! all children go through stages of hitting, god me and my brother used to punch the hell out of each other as kids, its called growing up, also it must be frustrating be that small and lack of communication can lead to frustration. I asked the childminder how her behavior was in day and she is always as good as gold if anything the other girl is more naughty during day. It just made me very upset and angry, i know i am doing everything i can to raise my daughter right, she is no angle but i always deal with any behaviors head on before they escalate the only other option i can come up with is to put her in a cage as she is clearly a threat to all human kind!!!! I would understand if she was pushing downstairs or attempting to stamp on her head but she isn't, she is doing what every child in her age group goes through, i bet if they were at nursery the behavior would be worse as more children fighting for attention. At least my daughter is public about her so called beatings, could be the other way round she could be pinning this other girl down behind the sofa for non to see!!!! Safe to safe was not happy today and felt my natural instinct kick in at defending my child and my parenting. The childminder was very understanding and reassured me she did not feel my daughter was a danger and that it was all being taken out of context and that my daughter was perfectly normal for her age and that its an over reaction on the other mothers part. Just dampens my faith in other mums and makes me feel like as a mum i will always be battling some problem or defending my actions to those who don't matter just a shame its from another mother who should know how hard it is herself. Rant over, now excuse me while i poke my daughter with a sharp stick in her cage and feed her animal carcass like the dangerous beast she is!!!! :P

Wedding Bells ding dong!!

Was at cousins wedding this weekend i got the privilege of being the hairdresser for the occasion so was there right from start to finish. Was surprised no nerves!! I still dont think its sunk in that they are married. the excitement was amazing everyone getting hair and make up done and chattering. The night before me and my cousin went through a list of all the last times she would be a miss like dinner, sleep etc. We shared a room with my daughter and at 2am got a bottle thrown at my head think she wanted milk, luckily no bruise on my head!!! The wedding was beautiful and her dress looked amazing on, was hoping for tears from groom and father of the bride but sadly no. But was lovely. The after do was good apart from when i though i had lost my daughter ready to burst into tears and go hysterical but turns out she had found the fruit machine so Que dashes to the door every 5 mins so the push chair was used as a play pen. I did come armed with a box of tricks containing coloring books, play dough, baby and cats which she decided she would play with when stuck in push chair. Once the music started she stayed mostly on the dance floor and going up to every body and anybody wanting them to dance. It was lovely to watch her. Then she fell asleep so was my turn to bust some moves on the dance floor and boy did i move. It was sad when the evening ended it had been fun, the groom and father of the bride were being propped up by the bar, I had a 50 year old i nicknamed kneecaps Frankie hitting on me, had to flash me rock and decline lol It got me thinking about my impending nuptials next year and i can not wait!!! I cant wait to have the big day where we cement our relationship and family and commit for life in wedded bliss. i think now a days some weddings can be big and extreme but no guarantee it will last, i prefer the simple weddings were the focus in on the commitment the two people make and then a big party after. Now a days there are so many people divorcing and it can put people of marriage, both mine and my fiances parents have been divorced but i dont base my views on marriage on my parents. I think me and my partner have done the most difficult thing in the relationship and that is having children, they are so testing on a relationship and completely change the dynamics of the relationship. We had a very very rough patch after our daughter was born and we have come out the other end so much stronger for it, i feel that our relationship has a very solid foundation and can last the distance. Its making me more excited about our big day, i already have plans for our 10 year anniversary and that's to go abroad and renew our vows. The more weddings i see and the closer me and my partner get, all our little romantic moments and more time spent as a family the more i cant wait for us to commit to one and other for life. So a big congratulations to my cousin and her new husband on their wonderful day and leaving me even more inspired and excited!!! next on the agenda for them is babies so get cracking!!!!

Spoke too soon

Ok i lied the washing machine is screwed!! I spoke too soon, the minute you put clothes in it, it cant cope the water don't drain and it slowly spins as though overacting a dying scene taking its last breaths and dying slowly!!! Oh joy my wages shall be going on that, just what i wanted!! What i wanted to do with my wages was save towards wedding, join a gym (with a creche so i have no excesses) get 2 piercings (my belly and that bit of your ear that's by your ear drum) and getting my nails done with girl from work. the one month i want to treat myself the washing machine gets jealous and starts to seek attention!! If it was a child it would have a time out and the tantrum ignored but its the washing machine, and without it we would have smelly disgusting clothes and my fiances football kit would stink!!! like opening his football bag full of 11 mens sweaty kits smells like a pissy cat litter tray its disgusting, I cant have that smell in my house!!! Luckily we have a laundromat 2 doors down but it costs money and a 19 month old playing nicely in a laundromat while i wash and dry clothes, cant see it, and im not leaving my clothes un attended, we are in a recession god knows what people will steal these days!! On the plus side body pump was good i don't ache and only my second week!!! saying that before i had my daughter or met my fiance i would live in the gym doing all the classes, the gym, swimming the lot so maybe its muscle memory surprised they remember that far back or could be the fact i pick up my daughter carry push chair up and down stairs, manual handle for work so maybe its strength i already have either way i may get brave and increase the weights slightly next week (don't get excited i said slightly) after returning from that i then exfoliated, epilated and plucked within an inch of my life, have a wedding this weekend don't want to ruin the pictures looking like big foot!!!

Washing machine situation avoided!!!

Well yesterday evening i went into melt down, my washing machine decided it wasn't going to drain the water out of the machine, i put it on spin about 5 times and a new wash. Still no luck, still full of water and nice soggy washing sat inside. So i tell my fiance the washing machine is broken does he know any one who can fix it? well sat on the xbox i got minimal response as though i hadn't said a word, 30 mins later he comes to look at the machine asks if i have spun it again, put it through another wash all the obvious things that of course i wouldn't think of doing?!!! Men so very useful in a time of crisis!!! So not much input from him but when I put on facebook about my plight i received lots of valuable information from WOMEN yes women no men offered to suggest what i should do to my machine. One suggestion was to open the flap at the front and drain it out. well I dont have a flap on mine so how very frustrating, turns out washer dryers don't have flaps at the front :(. So today at the childminders after getting useful numbers of handy men etc my childminder said hers had done the same a couple of weeks ago and it was a blockage so she had poured half a bottle of descaler in the machine and put it on a 95c wash and it had worked. So i searched the shops could not find the descaler she had used so instead i assumed Mr muscle sink and drain unblock could do the same. So return home, fill sink with lovely soggy washing while soaking myself trying to grab it out and chuck in sink to avoid minimal water on the floor (not that it matters as landlord is putting claim in for warped flooring after he warped the hell out of it trying to fix boiler which is a whole other story one that is all resolved but caused me great stress at the time) any way back to the washing not soaking floor. I put the Mr muscle in the washing machine drum which still had water in, left for 15 mins then put on a 95c wash, well 40 mins in and it was full of foam, i preyed i hadnt screwed it up further, but 30 mins later on way to childminders to drop my washing off she kindly offered to do (must remember flowers tomorrow) i noticed the foam had gone so took that as good sign it was draining. So after cup of tea and natter returned home to a water free clean washing machine!!! one more 95c wash for safe measure to make sure all the Mr muscle had washed away so as not to ca-rode the washing. So relived it means rather than spending £70+ on repairs or new machine i spent £2 instead. Although was warned after that Mr muscle can damaged and disintegrate the seals so think maybe once a month i shall do a 95c wash (no Mr muscle) to ensure all crap and gunk is flushed through. Although have a very good tumble dryer warms up but the drum wont spin round so maybe i should call someone and get a quote cos surely washer/dryers although ment for washing and drying, not sure its ment for a family of 3 on most days washing and drying. Just means dipping into saving for wedding very tough decisions, wedding or repair tumble dryer, maybe wait till i get paid see what i have, after all started new job on better pay so maybe can make an exception this month. Gosh life as a mum don't get more exciting than this on a Sunday and Monday night washing machine dilemmas highlight of the year!!!!

Modern times

Now the old view of the woman was to stay at home, cook, clean look after the kids and basically what i feel is a doormat to the husband who would go out work hard and expect dinner on the table followed with beer and a foot rub. Clearly old man did not meet me. I have never disillusioned my fiance into thinking i am indeed a domestic goddess. I can cook (very well) Im art and crafty, i know how to use a washing machine, i can clean but i will not hospital clean my flat every day, i hate ironing to the point it makes me angry so nothing gets ironed unless on the day of wearing it really does need ironing. I am a working mum and when im not at work i am spending time with my daughter and the thought of cleaning, well i can always find something else to do. Dont get me wrong my flat is clean and tidy but it is also lived in, i have a child of 19 months definitely not going to be a show home, but i like it that way.
Since starting my new job the past 2 fridays i have worked 1-9pm so in the morning the slow cooker is put on and daughter dropped to childminder leaving my fiance to do pick up, dinner, bath and bed and wow!!! I need to work lates more often, he does the cleaning!!!! Its lovely, he is spending quality one on one time with our daughter meaning they become closer, it means i have one less thing to worry about and he is helping with the house work :) We definitely live in modern times and my fiance is adjusting very nicely and it proves to me even more why he is husband material. I love my daughter but i think if my fiance wanted to be a house husband i would definitely let him, only for a few weeks as i would miss the swimming and gymnastics, also my other half isn't exactly a cook so i would still have to keep that up, but i dont mind i love cooking :)

Randome musings on a thursday night

Its a thursday night, nothing exciting, nothing special just a thursday. Today has been a good day. Got wedding cakes sorted, ok 18 months in advance but hey bonus points for organization!! also don't want to skint myself want to pay all off slowly so can afford the little luxuries that make a day special. This then got me thinking about weddings and some of the price tags. is it just me or is it mad that the average wedding costs 25k??!! that's deposit on a mortgage and some money to do up the property!!! my wedding will cost 4k, already have dress £75 bargain and beautiful would not guess price and its brand new too!! also i am making as much as possible for my wedding like table decks, invites. That is another thing wedding planners. Why? I think the fun and achievement of planning it yourself and doing it yourself is much better, makes day more personal. fair enough if you have won the lottery. But if the wedding planner does something wrong you cant shout at them they going on your instructions, you know the saying if you want a job done properly do it yourself. Completely relevant for weddings, yes ask friends and family for help, but we are in a recession and times are hard, but it don't have to cost the world to have a magical day, i think as long as you are saying i do to the person you love and are spending rest of your life with then who cares how you do it, where you do it or the price tag attached?

I have also written 12 pages of my box, that's most i've ever written, made me feel quiet angry, bringing back old memories, i clearly need to write it in order to deal with it, i also want to make a difference. I keep wanting to stop writing as it is pretty intense and im left emotionally drained, but it is one of my goals for the new year and i will make myself complete it, in between i am writing short poems and sharing with group i am part of life in rhyme to suppress or release the anger in between, think i will put the poems in the book as all part of it. I guess im shocked at how im feeling as i assumed i had suppressed it and moved on. Once i have completed it then I will decide weather or not to publish, decide when i also see peoples reactions to it that are close to me and aware of what I am writing.

I also realise im on a health kick, but i cant stop snacking!!! im doing more exercise so now my body wants more food!!! Im sat here munching on salted popcorn wondering if i can pass it off as one of my 5 a day as pop corn is technically made from sweetcorn?! No not happening, not sure i can get away with that one. Its like coke contains vegetable extract ok a 2 liter bottle probably contains like a pea size amount but can that count?? or do all the sugars and additives cancel that out? this then lead me onto the route of thinking about obesity and how much it costs on the nhs etc and that its normally the poorer families. well if we are an obese country and its critical why is all the healthy stuff so bloody expensive?? id love nothing more than to open my fridge and freezer and see a rainbow of fruit and veg and fresh organic, good for you, natural bacteria produce. But instead towards end of month or middle of month its full of convenience shove in oven, cheap as chips food. Yes i buy the frozen veg i try to make it healthy, but somehow i think the cook from frozen meat that's 90% fat cancels out the frozen veg. i reckon i should be in the government, this country should be run by mothers, imagine what a world it would be. multitasking, days planned down to a t. children put first, priorities in order, proper education etc. Yes send us mums to parliament that will sort us out!!! I have thought of a brilliant plan to get our country out of debt evey time a highly paid spoilt footballer cheats they must pay 10k off the national debt i estimate that the debt should be paid off in a month as footballers these days are not roll models and have real self control issues where their dicks are silver spooned by plastic fantastic. saying that the wifes arent any better they know what they are up to yet choose to stay there as there is finacial security, but what ever happened to women having brains, and pride oh and dignity. I could be with the richest man going but if he cheated it would be bye bye!!! i earn my own money and can look after myself thank you very much and if i cant i have a mother so there for no excusse for badly behaved men/boys.

And that people is my random musing for thursday night xx

Beach butt not beach hut!!!!

Oh sweet Jesus!!!! I am aching god knows what i am going to be like in the morning. i did body pump tonight with my mate. the instructor well reject from the Beatles is an understatement he even had a goatee. During the work out he really got into it hip thrusting, eyes popping, really feeling the beat. Me and my friend could not stop laughing. where as all the other people in the class were all stone faced like they had been dragged there. You all paid your money your there out of choice have a laugh people!!! Yes it killed when we started doing the chest on the 3rd song my arms began to become jelly like, then after that was arms well the shakes were awful and my arms were fighting with my body i was saying up they were saying piss off!! the legs wasn't so bad as most of my natural strength is in my legs any way. I was getting into the music so was my mate. I very much enjoyed myself. I got home and straight away in to a hot shower. While washing my hair my arms were still fighting the urge to go up past my shoulders, drying my hair proved even harder. Even writing this my arms are at a right angle and still telling me to stop moving!! Me thinks i am definitely going to feel it tomorrow. So i think a glass of wine is just what i need. Tomorrow is kinect night hopefully me and my mate will still have some movement in me in order to bust some moves about the place, if not we have agreed a cup of tea and a chin wag will do. Remember people we want beach butt not beach hut!!! That in mind all this aching if i wake up tomorrow and just one part of my body attempts to wobble i will not be a happy bunny!!! oh well at least i will be prepared for the Hitler routine next week!!